Gentlemen, Start Your Egos!

The Passion Of The Christ Opened Up On Ash Wednesday, Had A Good Friday.

Despite What The Wall Street Journal Says, Our Awards Are The Best-kept Secret In America, With The Possible Exception Of What George W. Bush Did In The '70s.

Since I Was A Kid, Every Thanksgiving Growing Up In New York, We Always Watched 'the March Of The Wooden Soldiers' By Laurel And Hardy. Never Miss It.

In High School, I Was The Class Comedian As Opposed To The Class Clown. The Difference Is The Class Clown Is The Guy Who Drops His Pants At The Football Game, The Class Comedian Is The Guy Who Talked Him Into It.

When Comedy Is Good, It's Jazz. The Beats Of It, The Looseness, The Improvisational Part, The Music-the Way You Hit The Inflection, The High Notes Of A Joke. It's All Melody To Me.