Every Television Show You Go On Is

Two Is Company; Three Is Fifty Bucks.

She Doesn't Understand The Concept Of Roman Numerals. She Thought We Just Fought In World War Eleven.

If You're Saying The Same Line 10 Times And Making It Look Like You Just Came Up With It, That's Acting.

I Hate Mcdonald's. I Don't Want To Order My Dinner By Yelling Into A Clown's Mouth. If I Want My Face In A Clown's Mouth, I'll Tongue Kiss Glenn Beck.

Just Remember: Surviving Is The Best Revenge, No Matter What The Disaster Has Been.