Blondes Have More Fun, Don't They? They

Not One Man In A Beer Commercial Has A Beerbelly.

I Rationalize Shop. I Buy A Dress Because I Need Change For Gum.

I Have A Hold Limit That I've Set For Myself. I Hold Until I Start To Imagine Myself Killing The Person On The Other End. Then I Hang Up And Regroup.

I Never Know What To Get My Father For His Birthday. I Gave Him A Hundred Dollars And Said, 'buy Yourself Something That Will Make Your Life Easier.' So He Went Out And Bought A Present For My Mother.

Men Who Can Eat Anything They Want And Not Gain Weight Should Do It Out Of Sight Of The Women They're Married To.