A Man Walks Into A Bar, And

I Bought Some Hp Sauce The Other Day. It's Costing Me 6p A Month For The Next 2 Years.

So I Went To The Chinese Restaurant And This Duck Came Up To Me With A Red Rose And Says "your Eyes Sparkle Like Diamonds". I Said "waiter, I Asked For A-romatic Duck".

I Cleaned The Attic With The Wife The Other Day. Now I Can't Get The Cobwebs Out Of Her Hair.

Went To The Corner Shop - Bought 4 Corners.

So I Knocked On The Door At This Bed & Breakfast And A Lady Stuck Her Head Out Of The Window And Said: 'what Do You Want', I Said, 'i Want To Stay Here'. She Said, 'well Stay There' And Shut The Window.