You Know What's Sad About This? Not

You Know What The Reward Is To Capture Saddam. You Don't Even Need To Capture Saddam, Just Say Where He Is. It's $25 Million. This Is What I Love About Our Priorities. We Spend $25 Million Trying To Get Rid Of Saddam Hussein. The Republicans Spend $50 Million Trying To Get Rid Of Gray Davis. It Doesn't Seem Quite Right.

Today The United States Has Admitted That After Months And Months Of Searching, We Still Have No Idea Where Osama Bin Laden Is. Osama Bin Laden? We Can't Even Find Kenneth Lay.

I Went To See The Terminator Movie The Other Night. Every Time Arnold Schwarzenegger Came On The Screen This Guy In Front Of Me Went 'booo! Booo!' And Was Throwing Stuff. I Had To Say 'governor Davis Just Shut Up And Sit Down!'

A Fitness Instructor In Maine Has Been Charged With Running A Prostitution Business Out Of Her Zumba Dance Studio. Authorities First Got Suspicious When They Saw Guys Going To Work Out At A Zumba Dance Studio.

Con Artists Are Using Obamacare Confusion To Sign People Up For Fake Health Insurance. The Scammers Lure Victims With False Promises Like, 'if You Like Your Healthcare Plan, You Can Keep Your Healthcare Plan.' The Scammers Will Tell You That, So You Have To Be Careful.