Wives Are People Who Feel They Don't

I'm Going To Iowa For An Award. Then I'm Appearing At Carnegie Hall, It's Sold Out. Then I'm Sailing To France To Be Honored By The French Government - I'd Give It All Up For One Erection.

I've Met A Lot Of Pin-up Girls, But I've Never Been Able To Pin One Down

He's So Full Of Alcohol, If You Put A Lighted Wick In His Mouth He'd Burn For Three Days.

Military Intelligence Is A Contradiction In Terms.

Do You Mind If I Don't Smoke?