When I Told My Wife She Was

Life Is Full Of Temporary Situations, Ultimately Ending In A Permanent Solution.

A Travel Agent Told I Could Spend 7 Nights In Hawaii No Days Just Nights.

What A Kid I Got, I Told Him About The Birds And The Bee And He Told Me About The Butcher And My Wife.

The Other Night A Mugger Took Off His Mask And Made Me Wear It.

When I Was Forty, I Was Getting Divorced, Living In A Low-class, Dirty Hotel In New York. My Mother Was Dying Of Cancer. I Owed $20,000. That Was About The Lowest. I Came Back To Show Business, And I Couldn't Get A Job. I Was Turned Down By Every Small-time Agent In New York.