Well, The Manhunt Continues For That Elusive

Do You Know What I'm Going To Do When I Retire? I Hope To Become The New Face Of Scientology.

You Know, Sarah Palin Is The Governor Of Alaska, You Know That. And She's A Lifelong Member Of The National Rifle Association. So Great, Is What I'm Thinking, Another Vice President That Shoots A Drinking Buddy; Just Get Ready.

I Was Talking To A Friend About Santorum. He Said, 'for All My Years In The State Department, I Know One Thing. Terrorists, What They Fear Most Is A Guy In A Sweater Vest.'

Those North Korean Hackers Are At It Again. Earlier Today They Leaked Santa's Naughty List.

I Think O.j. Protests Too Much. Not Only Did He Say He Didn't Carve The Holiday Turkey, But He Was In The Back Yard Practicing His Golf Swing The Whole Time.