War: A By-product Of The Arts Of

Coronation: The Ceremony Of Investing A Sovereign With The Outward And Visible Signs Of His Divine Right To Be Blown Skyhigh With A Dynamite Bomb.

Wine, N.fermented Grape-juice Known To The Women's Christian Union As "liquor," Sometimes As "rum." Wine, Madam, Is God's Next Best Gift To Man.

Prescription: A Physician's Guess At What Will Best Prolong The Situation With Least Harm To The Patient.

Debt, N. An Ingenious Substitute For The Chain And Whip Of The Slavedriver.

Happiness: An Agreeable Sensation Arising From Contemplating The Misery Of Another.