I Think That I Think, Therefore I

Calamity, N. A More Than Commonly Plain And Unmistakable Reminder That The Affairs Of This Life Are Not Of Our Own Ordering. Calamities Are Of Two Kinds: Misfortune To Ourselves, And Good Fortune To Others.

Congratulations Is The Civility Of Envy.

Humorist, N. A Plague That Would Have Softened Down The Hoar Austerity Of Pharaoh's Heart And Persuaded Him To Dismiss Israel With His Best Wishes, Cat-quick.

Quotient, N. A Number Showing How Many Times A Sum Of Money Belonging To One Person Is Contained In The Pocket Of Another - Usually About As Many Times As It Can Be Got There.

The Most Offensive Egotist Is He That Fears To Say "i" And "me." "it Will Probably Rain" - That Is Dogmatic. "i Think It Will Rain" - That Is Natural And Modest. Montaigne Is The Most Delightful Of Essayists Because So Great Is His Humility That He Does Not Think It Important That We See Not Montaigne. He So Forgets Himself That He Employs No Artifice To Make Us Forget Him.