Try To Save Something While Your Salary

I'm An Old Newspaper-man Myself, But I Quit Because I Found There Was No Money In Old Newspapers.

Any Man Who Would Walk Five Miles Through The Snow, Barefoot, Just To Return A Library Book So He Could Save Three Cents - That's My Kind Of Guy.

I'm Living In A Very Modest Place. I Have A Room Over-looking Beautiful Claridge's Hotel. I Thought It Was Better Than Paying Claridge's Prices And Overlooking The Dump I'm Living In.

How Do I Get To Carnegie Hall? Practice. Practice. Practice.

When I Give Concerts, The Tickets Sell For Five Dollars To One Hundred Dollars, But For My Concerts The Five-dollar Seats Are Down In Front... The Further Back You Go, The More You Have To Pay. The Hundred Dollar Seats Are The Last Two Rows, And Those Tickets Go Like Hotcakes! In Fact, If You Pay Two Hundred Dollars You Don't Have To Come At All.