Trends Don't Mean Anything To Me. If

If You're A Man And You Have Big Tits, Don't Wear A Tight T-shirt, Okay? It Confuses The Children!

When I Went To College, I Lived On Campus, And The Guys I Hung Out With Made The Characters In Revenge Of The Nerds Look Like The Rat Pack In 1962. I, Myself Made That Kid Booger Look Like Remington Steele.

The Average American's Day Planner Has Fewer Holes In It Than Ray Charles's Dart Board.

I'm One Of The More Pessimistic Cats On The Planet. I Make Van Gogh Look Like A Rodeo Clown.

Tv Evangelists Say They Don't Favor Any Particular Denomination, But I Think We've All Seen Their Eyes Light Up At Tens And Twenties.