To My Knowledge, I Was The First

I've Never Been Able To Tell Jokes. In The Beginning Of My Career I Did Impressions And Jokes Like Any Other Comedian, But I Was Never Very Successful Because I Did It Poorly. So I Started To Talk To The Audience And Started Talking About The Atmosphere Around Me And Started To Become Angry, Not In A Mean-spirited Way, But In A Fun Way - And My Attitude Developed From There.

Eddie Fisher Married To Elizabeth Taylor Is Like Me Trying To Wash The Empire State Building With A Bar Of Soap.

My Health, Thank God, Has Kept My Brain Alive.

You Throw Your Best Punch, Otherwise Don't Do It.

It's Very Sweet To Have People Say Nice Things About You, And I Always Accept That.