They Have Dog Food For Constipated Dogs.

The Cia Special Unit That Was Searching For Osama Bin Laden Has Been Disbanded. So I Guess, Mission Accomplished.

There's Already Been Some Trouble For Osama Bin Laden In The Afterlife. There Was A Mix Up And He Was Greeted By 72 Vegans.

The Russian Economy Is Tanking. It's Gotten So Bad That Today Vladimir Putin Had To Pawn His Stolen Super Bowl Ring. And Putin Will Finance His Next Invasion On Kickstarter.

Interesting Survey In The Current Journal Of Abnormal Psychology: New York City Has A Higher Percentage Of People You Shouldn't Make Any Sudden Moves Around Than Any Other City In The World.

Yesterday Was Election Day. If We Have Any Democrats In The Audience, I'm Sorry But You're Going To Have To Give Up Your Seats.