There Are Atheists And Christians, And There

I Never Really Worked With Chris Farley, I Hung Out With Him, But I Had Plans, I Had Big Plans, Movies, And I Was In No Hurry.

Before I Was Known, I Would Go On Stage And Pretend I Was Other People. Once I Pretended I Was Mentally Handicapped. It Was Really Wrong. One Time I Was A Bad Magician. And One Time I Pretended I Was A Christian Comic.

He Very Nearly Stole A Scene In My Movie, And I Didn't Call Him On It Because I Was Just Like, Hey, I Saw Some Stuff On Superdeluxe And How Many Different Films Do You Have On There? And He Goes, This One, This One, Comedy By Numbers And This One And One Called 'bob Pitches A Movie.' And I'm Like, Oh! And Then I Was Thinking He Would Say, Which Is Very Similar To The One To The One I Did In Your Movie, But He Never Did. I Just Let It Go. I Don't Care.

Yes, I Direct Commercials As Well. I Get These Really Weird Offers And Then I Have To Bid On Them And Win The Job. One Offer That I Have Now, And I've Already Done This Last Year For The Same Company, Is For Cash Value Cheese, This Cheese Out In The Midwest. I Did Two Spots For Them Last Year And I'm Going To Probably Do Three This Year. I Also Did Some For The Utah Transit Authority, Which Was Weird And Interesting And They Turned Out Really Funny - They Actually Won An Award.

I Know Its Corny, But Laughter Is A Two-way Gift, And Hearing People Laugh Just Warms Me Through And Through.