The Reason There Are Two Senators For

With High Definition Tv, Everything Looks Bigger And Wider. Kind Of Like Going To Your 25th High School Reunion.

At The Sharper Image Store, I Saw A Body Fat Analyzer. Didn't That Used To Be Called A Mirror?

Not A Good Night For President Obama. He Lost Elections In Virginia, New Jersey, And He's Not Doing Good In Afghanistan Either.

Well, Harry Reid And Other Members Of Congress, They're Just Furious Over This Olympic Uniform Deal. He Says We Should Burn The Uniforms, And It's An Embarrassment And A Disgrace. Not As Embarrassing As Congress Constantly Borrowing Money From The Chinese, But Still Embarrassing.

Things Have Really Changed Here In Hollywood. Used To Be People In This Town Couldn't Wait To Get An Envelope Full Of White Powder.