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It Turns Out Enron Workers Were Not Only Shredding Documents At Work, They Were Having Sex At Work. Having Sex And Shredding Documents. Those Are Two Things You Don't Want To Get Mixed Up.

Congratulations To Mexico. They Upset Brazil To Win A Gold Medal In Men's Soccer. And After The Olympics Ended, The Mexican Soccer Team, Of Course, Returned Home To Their Houses Here In Los Angeles.

The Democratic Convention Is $27 Million In Debt. They Had To Cancel The Kick-off Event At The Charlotte Motor Speedway. A Speedway Is The Perfect Place For The Democratic Convention. You Go Around In Circles, Turn Left Every Few Seconds, And You End Up Right Where You Started.

Today The Justice Department Released E-mails Where Walker Criticized America. In The E-mails He Said He Never Wanted To Set Foot In America Again. See, That's The Good Part About Hanging Somebody. Their Feet Don't Touch The Ground.

As We Head To War With Iraq, President Bush Wants To Make One Thing Clear: This War Is Not About Oil. It's About Gasoline.