The Plain Fact Is: Religion Must Die

I Don't Think George Bush Is A Good President By Any Imagination, But When He Said, 'if You're Talking To Al-quaeda, We Want To Know What It's About,' It Just Proves One Thing: If You're President Long Enough, You Will One Day Say Something That Is True.

One Of The Reasons I Still Do Stand-up Is Because It Was So Hard In The Beginning That I Feel Like It Would Be Such A Shame Not To Redeem It That It's All Fun.

Shouldn't We Be Against Procreation At This Point In Time? With Overpopulation And The Strain On The Resources On This Planet? Shouldn't We Reward People Who Don't Spawn?

If It Makes You Feel Any Better We Will Be Happy To Attack A Country That Had Nothing To Do With It.

Things Aren't Right. If A Burglar Breaks Into Your Home And You Shoot Him, He Can Sue You. For What, Restraint Of Trade?