The Child Molester Skipped Breakfast, But Said

Why Is It Called 'after Dark' When It Really Is 'after Light'?

My Mother And Her Plans For My Future. She Had It All Worked Out. I Would Attend A Nice College, Then Get A Job In Advertising. "you'll Be One Of Those Smart-looking Fellows In Their Madison Avenue Suits." And I Rebelled Against [my Mother] And Her Values And Her Plans For My Future At Every Opportunity.

Some People See The Glass Half Full. Others See It Half Empty. I See A Glass That's Twice As Big As It Needs To Be.

Praying Is Begging For An Unseen Deity To Alter The Laws Of Nature For Someone Admittedly Unworthy.

Every Day I Break My Own Personal Record For Number Of Days I Have Been Alive.