The Best Thing About A Vacation Is

Those To Whom His Word Was Revealed Were Always Alone In Some Remote Place, Like Moses. There Wasn't Anyone Else Around When Mohammed Got The Word Either. Mormon Joseph Smith And Christian Scientist, Mary Baker Eddy, Had Exclusive Audiences With God. We Have To Trust Them As Reporters--and You Know How Reporters Are. They'll Do Anything For A Story.

I Like Valentine's Day. The Trouble Is The Florists And The Candy-makers And The Card People Are All Advertising So Much, You Don't Dare Let The Day Go By Without Making An Offering, Whether You Mean It Or Not. Money Exceeds Affection.

You're Almost Always Better Off Keeping Your Mouth Shut, But Don't Let That Stop You From Popping Off.

I Am An Atheist... I Don't Understand Religion At All. I'm Sure I'll Offend A Lot Of People By Saying This, But I Think It's All Nonsense.

Writers Don't Often Say Anything That Readers Don't Already Know, Unless Its A News Story. A Writer's Greatest Pleasure Is Revealing To People Things They Knew But Did Not Know They Knew. Or Did Not Realize Everyone Else Knew, Too. This Produces A Warm Sense Of Fellow Feeling And Is The Best A Writer Can Do.