That's The True Spirit Of Christmas; People

I Know There Are Kids Out There, I Want To Make Sure They All Know That Driving Without Braking Is Not Something I Recommend, Unless You Have Professional Clown Training Or A Comedy Background, As I Do. It Is Not Something I Plan To Make A Habit.

A Dog Will Stay Stupid. That's Why We Love Them So Much. The Entire Time We Know Them, They're Idiots. Think Of Your Dog. Every Time You Come Home, He Thinks It's Amazing. He Has No Idea How You Accomplish This Every Day. You Walk In The Door; The Joy Of This Experience Overwhelms Him. He Looks At You, He's Back. It's That Guy, That Same Guy. He Can't Believe It. Everything Is Amazing To Your Dog. Another Can Of Food? I Don't Believe It.

If Every Instinct You Have Is Wrong, Then The Opposite Would Have To Be Right.

I Wonder Is Illiterate People Know The Full Meaning Of Alphabet Soup?

We Know The Product Is Going To Stink. We Know That Because We Live In The World, And We Know That Everything Stinks. We All Believe, Hey, Maybe This One Wont Stink. We Are A Hopeful Species. Stupid But Hopeful. But Were Happy In That Moment Between The Commercial And The Purchase. And I Think Spending Your Life Trying To Dupe Innocent People Out Of Hard-won Earnings To Buy Useless, Low-quality, Misrepresented Items And Services Is An Excellent Use Of Your Energy.