Stop Looking At The Walls, Look Out

I'd Rather Live In A Cave With A View Of A Palace Than Live In A Palace With A View Of A Cave.

When You've Been On A Programme Called 'an Idiot Abroad' Job Offers Aren't Exactly Flying In.

If You'd Have Told Me Five Years Ago That I'd Have Done All This - Two Books, Some Television And Everything - I'd Panic, I'd Be Scared.

If Dracula Can’t See His Reflection, How Come His Parting’s Always Neat?

I Don’t Understand Why People Take Pictures Of Mimes. Everyone Looks Like A Mime In A Picture.