Stand By Your Bed And Salute Me.

I Do A Public Access Show With Puppets. Puppets Called Actors, Tv And Movie Stars.

Divorce Lawyers Stoke Anger And Fear In Their Clients, Knowing That As Long As The Conflicts Remain Unresolved The Revenue Stream Will Keep Flowing.

Here In California, We Passed A Law Against Texting While Driving. But There's No Law Preventing You From Writing A Letter While Driving.

That's Why Credit Card Companies Are Evil. Are They Sponsoring The Show Tonight? ... They Are Evil.

Ocean's 13 Is All About Cool People Having A Good Time, And Who Doesn't Want To See That? Well You, Apparantly, 'cause You're Watching Me.