Southerners Are So Devoted To Genealogy That

The Confidence And Security Of A People Can Be Measured By Their Attitude Toward Laxatives. At The High Noon Of The British Sun, Soldiers In Far-flung Outposts Of The Empire Doctored Themselves With "a Spoonful O' Gunpowder In A Cuppa 'ot Tea." Purveyors And Users Of Harsh Laxatives Were Not Afraid Of Being Thought Mean And Unfriendly Just Because Their Laxatives Were. But In America, The Need To Be Nice Is So Consuming That Nobody Would Dare Take A Laxative That Makes You Run Up The Stairs Two At A Time, Pushing Others Aside And Yelling, "get Out Of The Way!

Chinks In America's Egalitarian Armor Are Not Hard To Find. Democracy Is The Fig Leaf Of Elitism.

Affirmative Action Was Designed Originally For "women And Other Minorities" But The Phrase Has Become Just Another Tortured Euphemism. Female Conscientiousness And Eagerness To Please Have Always Made Women Good Students And Natural Test Takers. Jews Have Gloried In Scholarship Throughout The Ages, And Asians Of Both Sexes Score So High On Sats And Iq Tests That They Regard Affirmative Action As An Impediment. Affirmative Action Really Means Favoritism For Blacks For The Sake Of Racial Peace, But The Favor Is Pure Chimera, And So, Increasingly, Is The Peace.

The Joker In The Deck Of Lesbian Fidelity Is Female Vanity: No Woman Of Fifty Is Going To Undress In Front Of A Woman Of Twenty No Matter How Much She Might Lust For Her.

I Have A Professional Acquaintance Whose Recent Eyelid Job Has Left Her With A Permanent Expression Of Such Poleaxed Astonishment That She Looks At All Times As If She Had Just Read One Of My Books.