President Obama Said He Is Going To

President Obama Has Begun A Three-state Bus Tour. I Believe The Three States Are: Confusion, Delusion, And Desperation.

President Bush Said That Our Kids Must Be Taught How To Read. He Said If His Aides Never Learned To Read, They'd Never Be Able To Tell Him What's In The Newspapers Every Day.

Former U.s. House Majority Leader, Tom Delay, Has Been Sentenced To Three Years In Prison. One Year For Money Laundering And Two More For His Performance On 'dancing With The Stars.'

As We Watched Judge Clarence Thomas's Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings, All Of The Commentators Said The Same Thing: 'one Of These People In The Room Is Lying.' Do You Believe That? You've Got Two Lawyers And 14 Senators In The Room, And Only One Of Them Is Lying?

So, Wesley Clark Is Running For President. Pretty Amazing Guy. Four Star General, First In His Class At West Point, Supreme Commander Of Nato, Saw Combat In Vietnam, Won The Bronze Star, Silver Star, The Purple Heart For Being Wounded In Battle. See, I'm No Political Expert, But That Sounds Pretty Good Next To Choking On A Pretzel, Falling Off A Scooter And Dropping The Dog.