Practice Makes Perfect.

We Are More Thoroughly An Enlightened People, With Respect To Our Political Interests, Than Perhaps Any Other Under Heaven. Every Man Among Us Reads, And Is So Easy In His Circumstances As To Have Leisure For Conversations Of Improvement And For Acquiring Information.

In Humility Imitate Jesus And Socrates.

All Things Are Cheap To The Saving, Dear To The Wasteful

Let Every Fart Count As A Peal Of Thunder For Liberty. Let Every Fart Remind The Nation Of How Much It Has Let Pass Out Of Its Control. It Is A Small Gesture, But One That Can Be Very Effective - Especially In A Large Crowd. So Fart, And If You Must, Fart Often. But Always Fart Without Apology. Fart For Freedom, Fart For Liberty - And Fart Proudly.

I Believe ... That The Soul Of Man Is Immortal And Will Be Treated With Justice In Another Life, Respecting Its Conduct In This.