Pere Noel. Babbo Natale. Pelznickel. Topo Gigio

If It Doesn't Say Binford On It, Somebody Else Probably Made It.

To Get A Man's Attention, Just Stand In Front Of The Tv And Don't Move. He'll Talk To You. I Promise.

I Have Way Too Many Commitments. I Get Pulled In Too Many Directions And I Never Seem To Be Able To Satisfy Anybody. People Get Turned On By Knowing A Celebrity, Even My Friends And Family. They Feel That There's Something Exciting About Me, But In Reality There's No Substance To It. People In Airports Just Hold On To Me Expecting Something And It Seems That I Always Come Up Empty. It's Frustrating Because I'm Trying To Please Everybody, And Ya Just Can't Do That ... At Least I Can't.

Nothing's As Easy As It Is On A Sitcom. Issues That We Take Care Of In 20 Minutes On The Show Can Stretch Out Over Years In Real Families.

Before Kady Was Born, I Didn't Think Having A Kid Would Be Such A Big Deal. My Attitude Was Simple: Babies Are Nice, Play With Them, Put Them In The Closet Until The Next Time.