People Spend Thousands Of Dollars Trying To

Here's A Tip For All You Aspiring Young Comics: Don't Beat Up The Customers. It Is Very Difficult To Get Laughs From An Audience When You've Actually Drawn Blood From One Of Their Number. It Kills The Mood.

Congratulations To The Nba Champion Boston Celtics - They Beat The Los Angeles Lakers By 39 Points. Or As Hillary Clinton Would Say, "too Close To Call.

Gas Prices - It Is $6 A Gallon Here. People In L.a. Are Furious. You Can't Tell, Of Course, Because Of The Botox.

People Spend Thousands Of Dollars Trying To Keep Their Teeth Straight. I Just Hope We Can Live In A World Where We Accept Gay Teeth.

I Think Commercialism Helps Christmas And I Think That The More Capitalism We Can Inject Into The Christmas Holiday The More Spiritual I Feel About It