People Say History Is Boring, And That

The Mistake That People Make In Stand-up Is Thinking They're Profound Or They're Deep When There Are So Many People Who Have More Worthwhile Ways Of Phrasing Things.

I Think Everyone Should Own Six Guns, Even Though I Don't Own Any.

You Can’t Make Everybody Laugh. You Gotta Just Do What You Think Is Funny. Just Be Obstreperous To Everybody.

I Don't Know Any Comedian Who Tailors His Act To His Audience. Maybe People Say They Do, But I Can't Even Imagine Them.

I Would Say Most Comedians Have A Very Cynical Worldview Of The Way The World Can Work. It's Almost Like If You Didn't, You Couldn't Be A Comedian.