One Way To Stop A Runaway Horse

You Never See A Pretty, Unattached Girl On A Racecourse. But You Often See Positive Gangs Of Rather Unpretty Ones. They Are The Owners Or The Owners' Wives And They Wear Mink In All Weathers And Far Too Much Make-up. For Some Odd Reason, I Can Never Work Out Why They Always Seem To Be Married To Haulage Contractors In The North, Builders In The South And Farmers In The West.

The More Necessary It Becomes To Stop Drinking, The More Impossible It Becomes To Stop.

I Have Stood In A Bar In Lambourn And Been Offered, In The Space Of Five Minutes, A Poached Salmon, A Leg Of A Horse, A Free Trip To Chantilly, Marriage, A Large Unsolicited Loan, Ten Tips For A Ten-horse Race, Two Second-hand Cars, A Fight, And The Copyright To A Dying Jockey's Life Story.

But You've Got To Have Money For Comfort, Which Obviously Doesn't Matter As Much When You're Young, But Even So. I Always Like To Bloody Eat Well And Be Warm. Have A Drink When I Want It.

I Have Been Commissioned To Write An Autobiography And I Would Be Grateful To Any Of Your Readers Who Could Tell Me What I Was Doing Between 1960 And 1974.