No One Gets A Free Ride. Except

My Favorite Procrastination Is To Make The Choice To Have Valuable Times With Human Beings That I Care About Instead Of Holing Myself Up Alone To Get My Work Done.

Today Is The First Day Of The Rest Of Your Life. And If That Doesn't Work Out For You, Tomorrow Is The First Day Of The Rest Of Your Life.

I Think Comedy Is On An Organic Upsurge Right Now Because When I Started, It Was 1978 At The Comedy Store And Letterman Had Just Stopped Emceeing His Morning Show.

A Good Way To Keep Your Relationship Together Is Not To Scream In Terror When You See Your Partner Naked.

Nothing Worse Than A Piece Of Dried Out Fish.