No One Ever Writes A Book In

The One Affectation I Have Forced On The Publisher... Are My Apostrophe-free Ellisions. Because I Write My Scripts To Read Myself, I Dont Spell 'don't' With An Apostrophe. I Spell It 'dont'. We All Know The Word And It Seems Foolish To Put In An Extraneous Apostrophe. Punctuation Marks Are Devices We Use To Make The Meaning Of Sentences Clear. There Is Nothing Confusing About A Word Like 'dont' Printed Without An Apostrophe To Indicate An Omitted Letter.

Never Trust The Food In A Restaurant On Top Of The Tallest Building In Town That Spends A Lot Of Time Folding Napkins.

The Only Thing That Really Bugs Me About Television's Coverage Is Those Damn Women They Have Down On The Sidelines Who Don't Know What The Hell They're Talking About. I Mean, I'm Not A Sexist Person, But A Woman Has No Business Being Down There Trying To Make Some Comment About A Football Game.

I've Learned... That I Wish I Could Have Told My Mom That I Love Her One More Time Before She Passed Away.

If, On The Other Hand, Happiness Depends On A Good Breakfast, Flowers In The Yard, A Drink Or A Nap, Then We Are More Likely To Live With Quite A Bit Of Happiness.