Never Trust A Journalist.

I Have A Theory That If You've Got The Kind Of Parents Who Want To Send You To Boarding School, You're Probably Better Off At Boarding School.

There Are So Many Kinds Of Awful Men One Can't Avoid Them All. She Often Said She'd Never Make The Same Mistake Again: She Always Made A New Mistake Instead.

Bloody Men Are Like Bloody Buses - You Wait For About A Year And As Soon As One Approaches Your Stop Two Or Three Others Appear.

The Reason Modern Poetry Is Difficult Is So That The Poet's Wife Cannot Understand It.

Bloody Christmas, Here Again, Let Us Raise A Loving Cup, Peace On Earth, Goodwill To Men, And Make Them Do The Washing Up.