My Philosophy Is That Every Phone Conversation

To The Engineer, All Matter In The Universe Can Be Placed Into One Of Two Categories: (1) Things That Need To Be Fixed, And (2) Things That Will Need To Be Fixed After You've Had A Few Minutes To Play With Them. If There Are No Problems Handily Available, They Will Create Their Own Problems. Normal People Don't Understand This Concept; They Believe That If It Ain't Broke, Don't Fix It. Engineers Believe That If It Ain't Broke, It Doesn't Have Enough Features Yet.

Management Is Nature's Way Of Removing Idiots From The Productive Flow.

Your Shower Is Ready - I Turned It On Last Night.

The Source Of All Unhappiness Is Other People. As Soon As You Learn To Think Of Other People As Noisy Furniture, The Sooner You Will Be Happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech

We Know The Goats Are Imported Because They Don't Speak English.