My One Big Regret Is That I

I Was Ill, And Everyone Could See It But Me.

Every Team Has A Hard Man. We Has Nobby Stiles, Chelsea Had Chopper, Arsenal Had Peter Storey, Liverpool Had Tommy Smith. Leeds Had Eleven Of Them

I Used To Go Missing A Lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World.

Me And A Mate Picked Up Two Darling Birds And They Took Us Back To Their Flat. I Went Into The Bedroom With My Bird And She Started Getting Undressed. I Was That Drunk I Was Standing There Wondering How To Get Undressed Without Letting Go Of The Award. I Went To Sit On The Bed, Missed It By Four Feet And Ended Up Lying On The Floor. I Remember The Bird Looking Down At Me, And Saying, ‘some Player Of The Year.’ Then I Fell Asleep. I Woke Up Still Clutching My Award And Staggered Out Of The Flat. I Hadn’t A Bloody Clue Where I Was.

They Told Me I Wouldn't Make 25. Then It Was 35, Then 45. These Were My Doctors Speaking - They're All Dead Now.