My Neighbour Asked If He Could Use

I'm Playing All The Right Notes, Just Not Necessarily In The Right Order

I Can Never Think Of The Time I Spend Idling In Railway Stations As Lost; It's A Waiting Liberated From The Three Temporal Vices Of Regret, Anticipation Or Boredom, The Weak Echo Of That Bliss Spent Between Lifetimes.

I Always Take My Wife Morning Tea In My Pyjamas. But Is She Grateful? No, She Says She'd Rather Have It In A Cup.

My Neighbour Asked If He Could Use My Lawnmower And I Told Him Of Course He Could, So Long As He Didn't Take It Out Of My Garden.

I Get Airsick Just Licking An Airmail Stamp.