I've Been Wrestling With Reality For Most

When I Was A Kid, My Nickname Was Mr. Baseball. Because Of The Stitches.

If An Asteroid Is Coming Toward You, You Don't Have To Blow It Up. You Just Have To Slow It Down Long Enough For Our Country To Rotate Out Of The Way.

Probably The Toughest Time In Anyone's Life Is When You Have To Murder A Loved One Because They're The Devil.

Whatever Happened To The Good Ole Days, When Children Worked In Factories?

I Thought I Was Raptured Up Into The Air Today; Turns Out, It Was Just My Gas Oven Exploding.