I've Been Outed As A Christian.

I Married A Woman Who Loves To Camp, And I Am What You Would Call "indoorsy"... My Wife Always Brings Up, "camping's A Tradition In My Family." Hey, It Was A Tradition In Everyone's Family 'til We Came Up With The House.

Gyms Are Always Packed. The Only Machine Available Is The One That Simulates The Gynecological Exam. You Know, The Sharon Stone Machine.

I Think That There's Part Of Me That Feels Like Maybe I Should Have Been More Social.

If Only Opening A Vitamin Water Could Be Classified As Working Out.

We Are All A Little Weird. And We Like To Think That There Is Always Someone Weirder. I Mean, I Am Sure Some Of You Are Looking At Me And Thinking, “well, At Least I Am Not As Weird As You,” And I Am Thinking, “well, At Least I Am Not As Weird As The People In The Loony Bin,” And The People In The Loony Bin Are Thinking, “well, At Least I Am An Orange”.