It's Weird With Stand-up Comedy. It Doesn't

I've Remade A Few Movies And They All Have One Thing In Common: Great Endings. If You're Going To Remake Something, Make Sure That Ending Is Tight. It's A Little Less Challenging, If You Have A Great Ending. If You Don't Have A Great Ending, Don't Remake The Movie.

Even If You Meet The Perfect Person, It Ain’t Gonna Be At The Perfect Time. You’re Married, They’re Single. That’s Right. You’re Jewish, They’re Palestinian. You’re A Mexican, They’re A Raccoon. You’re A Black Woman, He’s A Black Man.

Dude, I Didn't Say Jude Law Can't Act. I Didn't Say Jude Law Was In Bad Movies. I Just Said He's In Every Movie.

I Got Love From My Family. I Don't Really Need Love From A Paper, You Know What I Mean? I Can't Get Too Happy Because Somebody Said Something Nice About Me. I Appreciate It, But Let's Not Get It Twisted - This Is Not Changing My Life.

I Always Say About My Daughters, They Save Me From My Miserable Self. They Take Me Out, You Know, A Comedian, You Could Live In Your Head A Lot. And You're Writing And You're Doubting. But When I'm With My Kids And My Family, It's All About Them.