It's Cool To Be Healthy.

We Thought I Was Going To Be A Great Athlete, And We Were Wrong, And I Thought I Was Going To Be A Great Entertainer, And That Wasn't It Either. I'm Going To Be An American Citizen. First Class.

You Got To Die Of Something Because If You Die Of Nothing, They Won't Pay Your Insurance.

We Used To Root For The Indians Against The Cavalry, Because We Didn't Think It Was Fair In The History Books That When The Cavalry Won It Was A Great Victory, And When The Indians Won It Was A Massacre.

My Mother Was The Sweetest Lady Who Ever Lived On This Planet, But If You Tried To Tell Her That Jesus Wasn't A Christian, She Would Stomp You To Death.

I Used To Get Letters Saying, 'i Didn't Know Black Children And White Children Were The Same.'