It's Cold Out. It's Even Cold In

Thanksgiving Began In 1621 When Native Americans Sat Down With A Bunch Of Undocumented Pilgrims. They Had Dinner And The Pilgrims Never Left.

Well, It Looks Like We've Moved A Step Closer To War. Not With Iraq. With France And Germany. How Did We Screw That One Up?

There's A New Osama Bin Laden Video. He's The Only Person That Is Looking Thin During The Holidays. How Does He Do It? I Think He's Going To Jenny Craig.

The Big Story Now Is That President Bush Is Coming Under Attack For His Service In The National Guard. The White House Said, 'no No,' That They Have Payroll Records To Show That He Served In The National Guard. But Today, The Commanding Officers Can't Remember Seeing Bush Between May And October Of '72. President Bush Said, 'remember Me? I'm The Drunk Guy. Remember Me?'

Former Enron Founder Ken Lay And Ceo Jeffrey Skilling Found Guilty In The Enron Case. Ken Lay Is So Guilty I'm Surprised People Aren't Calling Him Congressman Ken Lay. Wait 'till These Guys Find Out In Prison That Insider Trading Has A Whole New Meaning.