It's A Great Day In America When

It's Not Even About Black And White Anymore, Because So Many People Are From Mixed Backgrounds And Mixed Ethnicities, And It's Just A Great Time To Be Able To Pull All That Together.

I Didn't Want To Be Nobody, And That Was The Only Way I Could Be Somebody Was To Do Stand-up.

Angie, I've Seen My Mom Wrestle Two Cops To The Ground With A Taser Dart In Her Neck, And You Cry When Your Shoes Pinch. Good Luck, Bambi!

I Grew Up Not Having A Father. Golf Is The Father I Never Had. It Taught Me Honesty And Respect And Discipline And It Taught Me To Control My Temperament.

The Jewelry Stores Say, 'tell Your Wife You Love Her With A Diamond,' While Wives Tell You They Love You With, 'ok, But Just Because It's Valentine's Day.'