In Real Life, People In The Most

You’re In Competition With Everyone.

You Must Not Look In That Mirror At Your Doughy Legs And Flat Feet, For Today Is About Dreams And Illusions, And Unfiltered Natural Daylight Is The Enemy Of Dreams.

Sometimes You Want To Have A Very Productive Saturday To Feel That You Are In Control Of Your Life, Which Of Course You Are Not.

This Is What I Tell Young Women Who Ask Me For Career Advice. People Are Going To Try To Trick You. To Make You Feel That You Are In Competition With One Another. You're Up For A Promotion. If They Go For A Woman, It'll Be Between You And Barbara. Don't Be Fooled. You're Not In Competition With Other Women. You're In Competition With Everyone.

I Have No Affinity For Animals. I Don’t Hate Animals And I Would Never Hurt An Animal; I Just Don’t Actively Care About Them. When A Coworker Shows Me Cute Pictures Of Her Dog, I Struggle To Respond Correctly, Like An Autistic Person Who Has Been Taught To Recognize Human Emotions From Flash Cards. In Short, I Am The Worst.