In Giving Advice, Aptitude Is Often Less

This Is A Thing I Read By A Scientist... It Said Scientists Now Say That A Man Thinks About Sex Once Every 7.3 Seconds. Now, I Know What I Think Every 7.3 Seconds. It's Just A Bunch Of Meaningless Gibberish.

If You Watch That Show And You Didn't Know It Was Called Seinfeld, You'd Think It Was Called 'the George Costanza Show'.

I Went To A Hypnotist. He Put Me Under A Spell, And Every Time I Had A Craving For A Cigarette, I Would Throw Up. It's Very Embarrassing Right After Sex. I Find It Pretty Hard To Get That Second Date After That. Girls Get All Snobby After You Barf On Them.

I'm Happy Doing Stand-up, But I'll Probably Do A Television Show Eventually. If Not, I'll Delve Into This Internet World And Decide Best How To Harness It. What I Like Best About It Is The Independent Movie Style And The Ability To Just Be Completely Reckless Within That World. I Like That A Lot. I Just Have To Acquaint Myself With Technology.

I Like Doing A Funny Show Where I Don't Have To Act And Fall In Love With A Girl.