I'm The Happiest The Saddest Guy In

I Never Wanted To Be An Actor. I Never Want To Be An Actor. I Want To Be A Movie Star. The Whole Idea Of Having To Act Is Too Gruesome. It's Too Ambitious For Me.

I Don't Drink Any Coffee Or Take Any Drugs And I Don't Smoke Cigarettes And I Don't Eat Sugar And I Don't Take Any Medicine At All. I Eat A Lot Of Fish, Vegetables, And I Stay Away From Starches.

I'm So In Love With The United States. Not As A Patriot. I'm In Love With America Like It's My First Girlfriend. The Geography, The People, The Smell, The Touch, The Taste, The Gas Stations. I'm Madly In Love With America.

My Parents Were Dishonest People. If It Was My Birthday, I Knew My Mother Took Me To The K-mart And She Stole My Toy. She'd Put It In The Shopping Cart And We'd Walk Out. I Was Raised With That.

I Don't Trust Or Love Anyone. Because People Are So Creepy. Creepy Creepy Creeps. Creeping Around. Creeping Here And Creeping There. Creeping Everywhere.