I'm The Happiest The Saddest Guy In

I Never Wanted To Be An Actor. I Never Want To Be An Actor. I Want To Be A Movie Star. The Whole Idea Of Having To Act Is Too Gruesome. It's Too Ambitious For Me.

I Drive Out To This Quail Farm, Where I Get A Lot Of These Incredible Quail Eggs, Which I Eat All Day Long. And I Eat A Lot Of Superfoods Like Goji, Cacao And Chia Seeds, Things Like That. And I Like Unpasteurised Milk Of The Goat And The Sheep. They Send It Once A Week From Pennsylvania, From The Amish Farms, And I Get It In Los Angeles.

I Would Be Delighted To Show My Film In The Viennale. I Do Not Offer Press Kits. I Do Not Offer Stills. I Do Not Offer Screeners. I Do Not Offer Dvd's. I Do Not Offer Posters. I Require A First-class Flight To Bring The Print However I Do Not Offer Any Photo Ops Or Press Exchange In Any Way. My Fee For Showing My Film Is $35,000 Dollars Us.

I Don't Trust Or Love Anyone. Because People Are So Creepy. Creepy Creepy Creeps. Creeping Around. Creeping Here And Creeping There. Creeping Everywhere.

My Parents Took An Interest In Nothing, At Home No Books, No Records. My Mother And My Father Are The Emblem Of Indifference, Dryness And Bad Taste. My Father Is Also Terribly Stingy, In Life As Well As In Feelings: I Have Never Seen Him Filling Up The Bathtub.