I'm Shooting A Pilot Based On My

I Don't Like Littering And I Think It Leads To Terrorist Activities.

When I Have A Really Hot Date At A Show, I Definitely Make It A Point To Use Her Name. The Girls Really Love That.

I Once Overheard The Sweetest Old Woman Behind Me On A Train Tell Her Adorable Old Husband As He Scoffed Down A Ham Sandwich She Had Brought Along, "if You Ever Yell At Me To "stop Bringing A Ham Sandwich With Me Every Where We Go" Again? Next Time I'm Bringing A Gun. And I'm Blowing Your God Damn Head Off."

It's The Worst Feeling When You Come Home Alone Late At Night And Think The Stranger Sitting On Your Couch Is A Pile Of Clothes.

On Stage I Am The Actor, Director And The Bouncer All At The Same Time. Fear Does Not Exist In This Dojo Does It? No Sensi! Sorry When I Get Excited I Have To Toss In Some Karate Kid Quotes.