I'm Not A Person Who Carries My

Texas Gov. Rick Perry Referred To The Mexican City Of Juarez As The Most Dangerous City In America. In His Defense, He Probably Just Thought It Was An American City Because There Were So Many Mexicans There.

If You're A Car Salesman, And Someone Says "this Is A Terrible Car, I'm Not Buying It," It Doesn't Mean They Hate You. They Just Don't Like Your Product. I Think That's A Mistake A Lot Of People In Show Business Make.. They're So Tied To Their Act They Take Everything Personally.

President Obama Is Asking Congress To Support A Military Strike In Syria. If They Approve, It Will Be The First Time Congress Has Officially Declared War Since Obamacare.

As You All Know By Now, Barack Obama Sent Out A Cell Phone Text Message At 3 A.m. On Saturday Morning To Tell Everyone He Picked Joe Biden As His Vice President. How Do You Think This Makes Hillary Clinton Feel, Huh? Finally, She Gets A Telephone Call At 3 A.m., It's To Tell Her They Picked Joe Biden.

My Favorite Halloween Candy Is The Candy Corn. It Comes In Four Colors: White, Yellow, Orange, Brown. Those Are Also The Stages Of Your Teeth Rotting After You Eat It.