Jesus Forgives Sinners, Not Criminals.

I’m The Frosting On America’s Cake, And Tonight I’m Willing To Let You Lick The Bowl.

So My Heart Goes Out To Them. Figuratively. I Would Never Actually Entrust My Heart To Scientists—they'd Probably Implant It In A Baboon. And A Baboon With My Heart Would Be Practically Unstoppable. Baboon Strength And Agility Combined With My Determination And Media Savvy? It Would Be A Threat To All Of Humanity.

I Used To Make Up Stuff In My Bio All The Time, That I Used To Be A Professional Ice-skater And Stuff Like That. I Found It So Inspirational. Why Not Make Myself Cooler Than I Am?

Keep Your Facts, I'm Going With The Truth.

Who Would Have Thought That A Means Of Communication Limited To 140 Characters Would Ever Create Misunderstanding?