If Your Eyes Hurt After You Drink

My School Was So Tough The School Newspaper Had An Obituary Section.

I Met Elvis First In Las Vegas. I Think I Was Appearing With Tom Jones And He Came Backstage To Say Hello To Tom Or We Went To His Dressing Room To Say Hello.

If Your Eyes Hurt After You Drink Coffee, You Have To Take The Spoon Out Of The Cup.

All's Fair If You Have A Really Good Attorney.

When You Go Into Court You Are Putting Your Fate Into The Hands Of Twelve People Who Weren't Smart Enough To Get Out Of Jury Duty.