If You Think A Quaterhorse Is That

[about Sex And Being Married] It's Like Being The National Guard, We May Not Be Seeing As Much Action As The Front Line, But We Are Living To Fight Another Day.

If You're A Man And You've Ever Been Antique Shopping During A Big Football Game, You're Either Gay Or Married.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Refer To The Time You Won A Free Case Of Oil As The Day My Ship Came In.

I Used To Say That Whenever People Heard My Southern Accent, They Always Wanted To Deduct 100 Iq Points.

Sacrificing Myself To Kill Hilary Clinton Was The Best Thing I Could Possibly Do For Humanity